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1. |
Math
03:44
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Math
© 2008 Rich Mahan
When I was a boy I had a good time at school
Always teasing the girls, and acting the fool
Yeah clowning around was always my favorite thing
Well I just couldn’t wait to hear the school bell ring
One afternoon during Geometry
I got caught passing notes with little Susie McGhee
Teacher asked me to read it for the class
My reply really made a big splash
I was sent to the office when I said with a laugh
It was my understanding there would be no math
I sat down at the principal’s desk
He said I got an F on my attitude test
2 days detention when I said with a laugh
It was my understanding there would be no math
Me and some friends went out to dinner one night
We were laughing and drinking everything was all right
We must have been there for hours, cause we closed the place down
When they brought us the check it really brought the mood down
As we divided it up, I had to say with a laugh
It was my understanding there would be no math
I don’t claim to be a juggler but I am anyway
Seems I juggle more and more things everyday
How did I get so busy where does the time go?
I remember summer days going by so slow
I’ve got too much on my plate and its blocking my path
It was my understanding there would be no math
I could never do the job that the president does
Too many people always fouling your buzz
Does he ever turn to the First Lady and laugh
It was my understanding there would be no math
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2. |
Tequila Y Mota
03:52
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I left work on Friday, got caught on the freeway
Took an hour and a half to get home
One thing I hate is when I get home late
Slowed down by some pinche cabron
So I called my compadres, come over to my place
Lets see if we can’t tie one on
We pulled down the blender and started a bender
That lasted the whole weekend long
Let’s make this weekend a dive in the deepend
Without any lifeguard in sight
Let’s put to the test a group pledge to fiesta
All day and straight through the night
Singin, “Hey Senorita, una mas margarita”
A double with a shot on the side
Tequila Y Mota Y mas otras cosas
Make Sunday a Saturday night
We must have been having a good time
Cause the police showed up around four
The music was loud and we musta been plowed
Cause they almost knocked down the front door
When they came inside, we scrambled to hide
The stuff cops sometimes lock you up for
They said keep it down, if we come back around
We’ll see the things we just ignored…
We made this weekend a dive in the deepend
Without any lifeguard in sight
We put to the test a group pledge to fiesta
All day and straight through the night
Singin, “Hey Senorita, una mas margarita”
A double with a shot on the side
Tequila Y Mota Y mas otras cosas
Make Sunday a Saturday night
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3. |
Favorite Shirt
04:09
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Hey it’s good to hear your voice,
I really had a lovely time last night
That party that you threw- no normal do-
It was a stone cold groove alright
Another reason that I’m calling,
I think that I left something over there
It’s my favorite shirt and
I think that I left it over by your easy chair
So anyway… What’s that you say?
You found it on the floor beside your bed?
And you’ve been laying there all morning
With it on your pillow right beside your head?
No I haven’t yet had breakfast and
A home-cooked meal sure sounds like a plan
How soon could I come over?
I’ll be there before the bacon hits the pan
Well she wore my favorite shirt
and nothing else,
It really was a sight to see
To watch her glide across the kitchen
With an omelet, whole wheat toast,
and fresh coffee
I’d only had a sip of coffee and a bite of toast
When she lowered the boom
She said, “That should hold you baby”
As she took my hand and led me to her room
She wore my favorite shirt and nothing else,
It really was a lovely sight to see
As she closed her door, flashed a smile,
& took off my favorite shirt in front of me
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4. |
Money In The Bank
03:15
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I’ve got the fever for the flavor of a cold red white & blue
& when that cravin hits you know that nothing else will do
Hey hey hey, hey hey hey
But I don’t have to worry cause I just filled up the tank
Cold beer in the fridge is just like money in the bank
Summertime’s for grillin out & treatin your friends nice
Nothin says I love you like a case of beer on ice
Hey hey hey, hey hey hey
I’m comfortable with who I am, I don’t care what you think
Cold beer in the fridge is just like money in the bank
The weather’s getting warmer and my mouth is getting dry
I’m going down to Circle K to kiss my thirst goodbye
Hey hey hey, hey hey hey
6, 12, 18, 30, how much do you drink?
Cold beer in the fridge is just like money in the bank
I’m comfortable with who I am, I don’t care what you think
Cold beer in the fridge is just like money in the bank
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5. |
Mama Found My Bong
02:35
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I came home from football practice one afternoon
Mama wasn’t talking, I could tell that I was screwed
I walked on back through the rest of the house,
to hang out in my room
In the middle of my bed, was the reason for her bad mood
Mama found my bong
After all the years I had it stashed in there
I’m surprised that it took that long
Now its time to face the music,
but I don’t wanna sing that song
Mama found my bong
The walk back to the kitchen, it was the longest that I ever took
I still remember the way I felt when she shot me that icy look
She threatened that she’d call my coach,
but what chilled me to the bone
Were the seven words that I heard next,
“Just wait till your father gets home.”
Mama found my bong
Well she shed a tear as she shared her fear,
I’d try the harder stuff before long
And as my dad pulled in the driveway,
I did my best to just stand strong
Mama found my bong
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6. |
Overserved in Alabam
03:33
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Well the bar started rockin’ at midnight
Under a Gulf Coast moon & an old streetlight
Every time I’m there you know it gets this way
We’re drinkin’ all night until the break of day
Overserved in Alabam
From Mobile to Birmingham
I’m not a think as you drunk I am
I’m just overserved in Alabam
I’d get up to leave if I could find the door
Flat on my back at the 5 foot 4
Jagermeister, Rumplemintze, feeling half sick
After 58 cans of PBR at the Nick
Overserved in Alabam
From Mobile to Birmingham
I’m not a think as you drunk I am
I’m just overserved in Alabam
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7. |
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On a tour through South Dakota
I was drinking scotch and soda
At a club that we were headlining that night
The barkeep she was flirty
Just a few years over thirty
She had a rose tattoo and smoked those Camel Lights
She kept that liquor flowin’
Her cards were really showin’
When she asked if I could help her in the back
She said she favored indoor sports
She dropped her cutoff shorts
And proceeded with a full frontal attack
You never really leave the hills of South Dakota
They stick with you, a souvenir for life
You can bet when I get back to Arizona
That those hills will cause me trouble with my wife
Well I knew that it was risky
But she was so damn frisky
I just couldn’t keep my mind on nothing else
She was really bein tricksy
When she poured me all that whisky
Cause it got where I just couldn’t help myself
Well I couldn’t escape the notion
That her steadfast devotion
To the carnal arts might be bad for my health
And just a few days later
At a truck stop in Decatur
My worst fears were confirmed below the belt
You never really leave the hills of South Dakota
They stick with you, a souvenir for life
You can bet when I get back to Arizona
That those hills will cause me trouble with my wife
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8. |
Rehab's For Quitters
02:54
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Rehabs for quitters, only users lose drugs
You can nuke gay whales for Jesus
But nuclear arms don’t give good hugs
Well you gotta believe in something, so let me put a bug in your ear
I believe you should get me another beer
Honk if you’re horny, then tell me how’s my driving
I hope the line you dial is 1-800-keep on riding
They say to love your neighbor, just make sure you don’t get caught
Or the field you plow might become the farm you bought
Rehabs for quitters, only users lose drugs
You can nuke gay whales for Jesus
But nuclear arms don’t give good hugs
Well you gotta believe in something, so let me put a bug in your ear
I believe you should get me another beer
Insanity’s hereditary, you get it from your kids
Well I childproofed my house, but they found a way back in
And if gun control means using both hands, then I guess I am to blame
Cause I miss my wife but I’m trying to improve my aim
Rehabs for quitters, only users lose drugs
You can nuke gay whales for Jesus
But nuclear arms don’t give good hugs
Well you gotta believe in something, so let me put a bug in your ear
I believe you should get me another beer
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9. |
I'll Get Off The Booze
02:56
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I heard you the 1st time, I heard you the 2nd, 3rd and 4th
I grabbed a 5th, gave the top a twist,
threw it back and I let that liquor pour
It’d be a little slice of heaven if you’d cut me some slack
I’ll get off the booze as soon as you get off my back
You told your girlfriends, you hate the way that we communicate
Yet you forgot to mention,
you get your point across by throwing plates
Flying Cups and Saucers in a midnight sneak attack
I’ll get off the booze as soon as you get off my back
I’ll get off the booze as soon as you get off my back
I’m mixing up a cocktail as you’re planning your attack
Try killing me with kindness and I’ll cut back on the Jack
I’ll get off the booze as soon as you get off my back
Hey now Honey, What you think we’re really fighting for?
Are you mad because you couldn’t change the things I do,
Those things that you abhor…
When you love a man for who he is, he’ll drop that paper sack
I’ll get off the booze as soon as you get off my back
You put down your frying pan I’ll put down my 12 pack
I’ll get off the booze as soon as you get off my back
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10. |
Put A Little Lovin On Me
02:19
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You’ve got a Paul Newman T-Shirt
Willie Nelson Hat
A Poster of Charlie Daniels Band
And just the other night Honey
We were makin love,
you slipped up, called me Elvis Again
Ringo Starr, didn’t pay for your car
Jim Croce, don’t buy the groceries
Johnny Cash, never took out the trash
You better, put a little lovin on me
You got a Burt Reynolds picture taped over the bed,
He ain’t hardly got nothing on
When I wanna love you and I turn out the lights
You wanna turn the lights right back on.
Ringo Starr, didn’t pay for your car
Jim Croce, don’t buy the groceries
Johnny Cash, never took out the trash
You better, put a little lovin on me
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Rich Mahan Nashville, Tennessee
Guitarist/singer-songwriter Rich Mahan lives in Nashville, TN.
He credits the Grateful Dead with
opening his ears to all styles of music, and has adopted their pursuit of "Fun at all costs" as his mantra, applying that esthetic to the creation of his music.
He moved to Nashville in 2010 to make music and join the city’s growing population of Golden State Refugees and eat Prince's Hot Chicken.
... more
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